Art by Rob Goldstein

I hate having a mental illness.

I hate the stifling everyday management
of it.

The realization that everything I want is mine
but for this stone thrown in my path by fate
or my Mother or that inexplicable genetic
variable that
has nothing to do with either.

I hate having a mental illness.

I hate the fear and shame.

Of knowing that friends leave because of
a quirk that causes me to say things
too personal or too cutting.

Of the cognitive dissonance of an adult body
and a childโ€™s spirit that
doesnโ€™t understand
the limits of time.

Of the shrinks, the bewilderment and
the inability to
know the difference between
ignorance
and malice.

I hate having a mental illness.

I hate it with the passion of this
prayer
that tomorrow I will awaken
and be healed.

RG 2015

mhwgmember2015Blog for Mental Health 2015

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