tears of attempting  suicide. .just a looser 

“Triggers ”

It’s me tonight crying screaming and trying to find a head space of okness. .I feel like I’m my mom years of watching her try end her life yet that’s just a feeling …it’s me and I’m battling, the walls are tumbling down family arrive in hours from UK and hubby and I fight because I’m battling I’m not ok. ..

It’s unfair I didn’t ask for this..I spent hours alone contenplating the guts I’m just a looser alone in it and the rest win again 😩:'(


One comment

  1. You’re never a loser! Your illness can make you feel that way but it’s not you. I hate to say the type of thing, if your husband won’t accept you are ill and expect you to act a certain way. FUCK HIM! You are what matters. What is meow important satisfying everyone by being wait service or trying to pull yourself together. Talk to your kids alone and they may or not understand you are sick. If they don’t it’s not the end of their world.
    as we’ve talked before if you are thinking of suicide go to hospital. You are to sick and might react to another insult. Lisa, It’s a bitch, drag yourself off the sidewalk to the couch and sort through what is the root cause. Lately it sounds like your husband is the trigger?
    Take care. People love you and I know you love your children. Put in the circumstances in order to celebrate with them, I believe you will walk away worse. Think hard on that. You can take the kids for ice cream or something to elebrate their Bday just the say.


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