When I started training one of the hardest tasks was the initial Visual Assessment. It was simple, take photographs of myself front, back, left and right. Dutifully I did it early one morning, cropped my head off and sent it off.
That was 3 years ago today. Sure I see a lot of difference in my body. But it is what I feel that is more important.
I no longer hate my body. Infact I’ve come to like it. I don’t think that freedom is as tied into results as it may seem.
I always yearned to step into the weight room. The struggle isn’t only with the plates. I’ve dumped a lot of baggage and grown. I’ve developed a greater connection to my body, identity and goals. I will be forever grateful to my friend who encouraged me to train with Nick Deacon.
We’ve laid a good foundation and I know I am ready to pack some muscle on.
Survivors Blog Here Mental Health Collaborative 
I like you as you are.
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Thank you Nan.
I know superficially I am investing energy in my outer self. But what I value most is personal growth.
In high school there was a weight room. I wouldn’t even allow myself to glance in because I may be caught. I couldn’t explain my interest without revealing my dream and admiration. Doing so would have stepped on the feet of real boys.
Everyday when I step into that gym is a victory. There was a time not long ago when I couldn’t stand seeing my reflection. The simple act of checking my form in the mirror is freedom from my past.
I am doing what I have always wanted to. Stepping onto my path, into my life brings me joy. The process is everything, results are just a by product.
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B
Can’t wait to hear the weekend this is a huge step in taking pieces of you back. HUGS to you.
M
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I am still processing last night, but I am happy I went!
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All steps add to forward motion, to the next challenge to overcome. I see a smile a smile, just set a goal and the fact you went is the deal breaker. You are a Winner.
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