Silly but I’ll share it 1/26 — The daily addict

So I think this might fall into the superstitious category. We all know the common ones like a broken mirror is 7 years bad luck, a black cat crossing your path, death comes in threes or not to walk under a ladder. Sports players won’t shave their beards or cut their hair when they are […]

Silly but I’ll share it 1/26 — The daily addict

Feeling embarrassed 1/19 — The daily addict

Last week I was with my charges; George (7) and Clay (5). We were at the playground where Clay had broken his arm about 8 months ago. Clay had fallen off the monkey bars last May. All his weight landed on his arm for a clean break and a cast all summer. George was asking […]

Feeling embarrassed 1/19 — The daily addict

I am a fish – my thoughts – the bait 11/17 — The daily addict

I keep learning about the play of life. The beauty the nonsense the funny the scary the anxious the kind and the rough. The impatient the relaxed the millions of different states that this physical body can feel in any given day. I watch them all come and go. Some I might get caught up […]

I am a fish – my thoughts – the bait 11/17 — The daily addict

Zoom Recovery 9/16 — The daily addict

I find that addicts tend to be very resourceful people. During active addiction the things that we did to “get” what we needed and the lies that we told to hide it…sometimes were quite clever. So when the pandemic hit we were very fortunate that the resourceful recovering addicts used the zoom platform to hold […]

Zoom Recovery 9/16 — The daily addict

The need for attention 9/9 — The daily addict

Such a funny thing. When I was early in my recovery I believe I was seeking attention from others, especially the opposite sex. (sometimes I can still fall into that trap) The drugs and booze were gone so my ego was desperately seeking to fill itself with something else. Even though I understand it now, […]

The need for attention 9/9 — The daily addict

How does he know that? 8/6 — The daily addict

The children that I nanny for; George (6) and Clayton (4) are wise beyond their years. Maybe all children are this way..but I currently am experiencing the wisdom of these two. One day while driving Clay to speech class we were talking about the day ahead. He was asking what will we do after speech. […]

How does he know that? 8/6 — The daily addict

This illusionary costume 7/31 — The daily addict

The physical costume that I am wearing feels like it keeps getting filled with nonsense. I was listening to a spiritual guru named Mooji this morning. He states that “all problems are personal.” This statement sheds light on my egoic self. The self that claims an identity in this costume that I physically wear. I […]

This illusionary costume 7/31 — The daily addict

A life saving tool 7/26 — The daily addict

Depending on what you are addicted to…be it drugs, alcohol, women, men, drama, anger, fighting, shopping, food, money, or gambling – it controls you and you do not control it. My experience in addiction has been with drugs and alcohol. The substances controlled me because every decision I ever made while I was using revolved […]

A life saving tool 7/26 — The daily addict

Obsession beats self will 7/15 — The daily addict

I love to have proof of something. God…prove it! I can attest to the fact that I could not with my own mere mortal self will beat the obsession that I had for alcohol and drugs. When the addict/alcoholic takes the first one..be it drink or drug…the phenomenon of craving begins which then triggers an […]

Obsession beats self will 7/15 — The daily addict

Life and Death decisions 6/30 — The daily addict

A choice or a decision that might seem trivial to the non addict can actually become a life or death situation for the addict in recovery. Especially someone NEW in recovery. I was listening to a gentleman named Kyle share at a meeting the other evening. He stated that he had 20 days clean. He […]

Life and Death decisions 6/30 — The daily addict

To identify and not compare 6/24 — The daily addict

This is a concept that I was first introduced to in recovery. I was taught when someone was sharing their thoughts and feelings at a meeting to “identify” with the speaker and not “compare” myself to them. Coming into the rooms of recovery there is every walk of life imaginable. Much to my surprise there […]

To identify and not compare 6/24 — The daily addict

What does addiction have to do with it? 6/21 — The daily addict

The other day I received a comment on a post that got me thinking. The person was wondering what addiction had to do with the topic that I had posted about. Such a good comment because it made me realize not everybody knows. Not everybody knows that EVERYTHING that I encounter in this life, every […]

What does addiction have to do with it? 6/21 — The daily addict

Addiction is a response 6/13 — The daily addict

I was listening to Dr. Gabor Mate give his explanation of addiction on a youtube video. Gabor stated that “Addiction is a response to human suffering.” I understand this perspective. I have heard it said many times in recovery that the drink and drugs are but symptoms of the disease. So it is like sneezing […]

Addiction is a response 6/13 — The daily addict

The island of misfit toys 6/7 — The daily addict

I have heard many times in recovery addicts referring to themselves as belonging on the island of misfit toys from the Rudolph classic. I always found this to be a light funny way to express the feelings that we as addicts did not «fit» into society. We were the unwanted. The outcasts. For many these […]

The island of misfit toys 6/7 — The daily addict

Did I choose Addiction? 6/1 — The daily addict

As a child with dreams and an astounding imagination becoming an addict was most certainly not on my list of wants or to do’s. But the thing that my hearts deepest desire held …… led me to become an addict so I could simply and truly understand the connection with a higher power. Confused? Here […]

Did I choose Addiction? 6/1 — The daily addict

The unique addict brain 5/30 — The daily addict

I was listening to someone sharing on a recovery meeting. They said they were working a new job and their coworker was complaining about their psychiatrist. Apparently the psychiatrist just kept giving prescriptions for Ritalin to the coworker. The coworker expressed she hated the effects of it and really wanted a new doctor. The addict […]

The unique addict brain 5/30 — The daily addict

When one sibling is sick 5/26 — The daily addict

Pickles and Snoopy are 12 year old cats and they are brothers. Pickles has been ill and diagnosed with cancer for about 3 weeks now. What I am noticing is the attention and focus that Pickles is getting and the neglect that Snoopy is receiving. I literally find myself a little annoyed with Snoopy when […]

When one sibling is sick 5/26 — The daily addict

A Built in Forgetter 5/20 — The daily addict

When I first came into recovery and I heard it shared that we as alcoholics/addicts have a “built in forgetter” I was very confused. Fresh out of rehab and attending meetings the bruises on my face were healing but my insides were extremely uncomfortable. I thought it ridiculous that I would EVER FORGET the pain […]

A Built in Forgetter 5/20 — The daily addict

A family disease 5/19 — The daily addict

Last Saturday evening I was at a recovery meeting to see my friend Bootsie celebrate his 31 years of clean time. There was also another gentlemen named Mike and he was celebrating 11 years. They both shared a bit of their personal story. Bootsie has just started sponsoring this man. Helping him help himself. What […]

A family disease 5/19 — The daily addict

“I wanted to fit in” 5/11 — The daily addict

Monday morning I got to hear a beautiful recovering soul named Michael share his experience, strength and hope at a recovery meeting. Michael came into recovery about 7 months ago. He arrived confused, broken and lost…..but ready. What blew me away was that he already recognizes that the drugs and booze were but symptoms of […]

“I wanted to fit in” 5/11 — The daily addict